May 20 2008
Should Children have Chores?
When I was a kid, I really felt that the sole reason why my parents had children was for the cheap labor. I mean, by the time I was 4, I already had several chores that were assigned to me; namely the bathroom. I still remember my parents watching me while I was scrubbing the toilet and commenting, “Sirena does such a great job cleaning the bathroom; she’s going to make a great little wife.”
I was somewhat mystified about that comment and I had no idea why my ability to clean a bathroom was the clincher to me being a “great little wife.” I think that was the day that I believed my siblings and I were given too many chores and I swore that I would never do the same with my kids.
Fast forward 25 years and I am now a parent of a 3 and 6 year old. Neither of them have to do any chores, expect keep their toys tidied up and put their laundry in the hamper. That is it, although at times that can seem like a huge task in itself.
I tidy their rooms, make their beds and do the majority of chores around the house. It is, after all, the essense of what makes a woman a “great little wife.” Isn’t it? I never really felt that the kids needed to have chores and I certainly didn’t want to drag my 3 year old into the bathroom and teach him the fine art of toilet scrubbing.
Lately, though, I have found that the kids, more important my oldest, need to have a few more chores to really understand the theory behind working for your money. His allowance is very low, but he gets it for only keeping his toys picked up, a task that shouldn’t involve pay.
So last night during dinner, I said to him jokingly, “I think you should do the dishes tonight.”
His face brightened and a large smile filled his face as he said, “Really, ok.”
My husband looked a little nervous and argued the fact that maybe his son couldn’t wash the dishes since he was only 6, almost 7, but he quickly relented.
I have to say that with only a few tips, my son quickly grasped the concept of washing the dishes and I was there to help him finish them off. He was beaming with a sense of accomplishment by the end of it and we discussed a few chores that he could do every week to earn extra money.
This experience has led me to believe that yes, children should do chores because it teaches them responsibility and it also allows them to be a contributing member of the family. They gain knowledge on how to take care of themselves and their home, have the opportunity to bond when they are learning how to do something new and gain self confidence and self esteem when they have finished something successful.
I was completely surprised, given my own feelings about chores, but this was an instance when my child has taught me something and that maybe my parents weren’t in it for the slave labor. Of course, after plucking 200 chickens one weekend when I was 5, I still have my doubts.
So what about you? Do you think children should have chores?
Sirena Van Schaik
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